Pipe Down

All of us have a little voice in our head that gets reeeeeeally feisty the moment we hear something that differs from what we already believe. It's good to be skeptical, but not to the point where we won't even consider opinions that differ from our own. None of us is right 100% of the time, so there is nearly always something to be gained by respectfully considering another's perspective. So the next time you immediately feel combative upon hearing an opinion that's different from yours, tell that little voice to "pipe down!"

Paving the road

Wouldn't it be nice if the road to hell were so clearly marked? But I digress...

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions"? Nah, I don't buy it. The devil and his minions only wish that were true. And they'd sure like us to believe it. Sure, bad things sometimes happen as a result of some misguided but well-intentioned act. But that's why we have a Savior. Thanks to the Atonement, we are not judged by the results of our actions but by the desires of our hearts (D&C 137:9). We will make mistakes. There's no getting around that. As hard as we may try to do the right thing, we will stumble. But if we accept Christ into our lives, love Him, and show that love by striving to keep His commandments (John 14:15), in the end it will be enough. Not because we've earned our way into heaven, but because He's paved the way for us.

Stop asking.

Just a quick one, because I was impressed by something I heard on a podcast I recently listened to. "Dear Hank and John" is a podcast put together by Hank and John Green (creators of Crash Course, SciShow, and other popular channels on YouTube as well as the books Fault in our Stars, Paper Towns, etc.) in which they take questions from their listeners and offer dubious advice in humorous fashion. Occasionally they'll answer a question that's a bit more serious, and in their recent episode they answered a question they've gotten from a lot of their listeners, and I felt it's very important for everyone to listen to it. You can listen below. The segment I'm referring to starts at 12:55 and ends around 17:00.
(You can click this link to jump directly to the segment: https://soundcloud.com/dearhankandjohn/067-feeling-home#t=12:55
Or listen to the embedded player below.)



To summarize Hank and John's remarks, when you ask someone if they would be interested in pursuing a romantic relationship and they say no, you absolutely must accept that as their final answer and respect that answer. Failing to do so by continuing to ask them is a form of harassment. As Hank said, I think many of us (myself included) have been guilty of this, perhaps innocently thinking "I should ask again. Maybe things have changed." We don't think we're having that creepy stalker vibe portrayed in my little cartoon above. But we may not realize how uncomfortable and even unsafe continuing to push the issue may make the other person feel. On the other hand, honoring their wishes shows respect for that person's agency.
So please, if you seek a relationship with somebody and discover that they aren't interested, however innocent you may feel your intentions are, leave them alone. You will likely save both of you a lot of stress in the process.